Masters of Mindfulness
The first step towards building a bond with a horse is the same as in any relationship: spending time together. However, not all time together is created equal. Imagine hanging with a friend while they’re looking at their phone. You ask a question. They don’t hear it. You repeat the question. Finally, they look up saying, “What? I’m sorry, I wasn’t listening.” I’ve been on both sides of this situation, and neither feels like I’m building a lasting connection. If I want to continue experiencing meaningful relationships, I must practice mindfulness.
What does it mean to be mindful? The American Psychological Association defines mindfulness as “...a moment-to-moment awareness of one’s experience without judgment.” As simple as this sounds, anyone who’s tried meditating knows awareness of our present experience can be elusive, especially when our own thoughts distract us. Fortunately, I’ve found as with most things, mindfulness gets easier with consistent practice. Of course, my favorite ways to practice involve horses, the true masters of mindfulness.
Every day spending time with the horses in their pasture, I take about ten minutes to meditate and sink into the present moment. There’s a lot of meditation tools out there; currently, my favorite is Sam Harris’ Waking Up app. I also love doing yoga as a moving meditation (Yoga with Adrienne is an excellent free resource). After meditation and yoga, I get out my journal and do my best to experience the world the way a horse would—fully aware of all five senses. This is a technique my liberty horsemanship mentor Carolyn Resnick teaches for “getting into a state of neutral”. If a bird sings, I write it down. If a cold breeze raises goosebumps on my arms, I write it down, and so on until I’m mindful of my experiences in the present moment. After all of this practice, I feel ready to put my mindfulness to the true test by approaching the horses.
As prey animals, horses’ lives depend on mindfulness. Because horses must be aware of any potential predators, they value mindful herdmates who can help alert them to danger and might be distrustful of those who are clearly unaware of their surroundings. If I walk up to horses while distracted, they’ll often run away from me. However, if I’m truly present, I’m able to “listen” to their body language, allowing us to begin a conversation and connect. Once, a pair of horses that refused to let me get anywhere near them literally ran right to me as soon as I dropped into a meditative state. I’ve heard horses tend to like young children because they’re naturally present in a way adults--more prone to “monkey mind”--aren’t. Recently, I had the pleasure of seeing this in action with my two-year-old niece. I watched in amazement as the horses repeatedly followed her around, moving to stand near her wherever she was sitting.
My niece, learning how to greet her new best friend.
It’s clear to me mindfulness is a key ingredient in all strong relationships. As I continue building connections, I’ll keep practicing being as present as a horse, attuned to the moment and whoever I’m with. What’s your favorite way to drop into the present? Have mindfulness practices impacted your life? I’d love to hear your stories in the comments below or on Instagram, Facebook, or LinkedIn. May the horse be with you, always!
