Horses’ Native Language

It was 2019.  After years of partner dancing as a follower, I decided I wanted to learn how to lead a dance. After all, I’d done most of the moves hundreds of times as a follow—how hard could it be to lead? 

As it turns out, it was excruciating. 

There I was, in the middle of class, and I couldn’t—for the life of me—communicate the movement I wanted from my partner. The more I tried, the more I got in my head and out of my body. I was increasingly convinced I’d never get it to work. 

Flash forward to 2021. This time, I’m in a horsemanship lesson learning to lead my horse, and again—I’m struggling. I recognized the familiar tune of failed communication as I try and try to get my horse to move. Finally, my instructor asks me, “In the core of your being, do you believe that horse will move?” Honestly? I didn’t. “There’s your problem,” she said.

Suddenly, it clicked. I was failing now for the same reasons I’d struggled to lead my dance partners back in 2019. I wasn’t fully present in my body and I didn’t have a clear intent to move because I was too worried about failing. I was missing both presence and intention, two vital ingredients for communicating, especially with body language. Luckily, when it comes to conversations with movement, horses are some of the best teachers you can find. You might even say that dance is a horse’s native language.

We’ve discussed how horses must be present in their surroundings to avoid predation, but being present is also vital for effective communication. Understanding body language is key for achieving and maintaining harmony in a herd and requires paying close attention in any given moment. Horses must be talented at reading extremely subtle body cues, or risk being picked on by their herd mates. If you watch a group of horses together, you may see a request for movement communicated by a single weight shift, a pinned ear, or even an eye roll. Any movement could have meaning. If a horse misses these subtle cues, they risk being bitten or kicked for their negligence and may lose their social status in the herd. This talent for “listening” to subtle cues is partly why many people have heard that horses can sense excitement, fear, and other emotions. They don’t need a 6th sense to read us—their presence and our unconscious body language tell them everything they need to know. 

While my human dance partners are usually polite enough not to bite or kick me when I miss a cue, the idea of presence is the same. When I’m dancing, especially with a partner, it’s almost impossible to think about anything other than what I’m doing here and now. Both my partner and I must be continuously listening to each other to create fluid movement. Like it is in the herd, any movement can have meaning on the dance floor. To keep communication clear, dancers are usually careful to eliminate as much extraneous movement as possible. I learned this was especially true when leading. I’m mindful of moving only the parts of my body that help communicate my intended movement. As tempting as it is to mindlessly flail my arms like an air dancer when my jam comes on, it clouds any other communication. My steps on the dance floor are the same when I’m communicating with my horses: clear and simple. Forward or backward and side to side; vague diagonals or wandering steps are eliminated. Each move is clear and present. Mindful movement allows simple body language to blossom into a magical unspoken connection between both horse and human partners. 

Horses’ sensitivity to presence and body language also tunes them into intent. After all, clear body language stems naturally from clear intention. This is why it’s crucial to be completely present with myself and my intent before I seek to communicate with movement. In order to ask a horse to move and for them to believe my request, I have to believe it myself first. If I don’t believe I can do it, the horse won’t either.  If the horse reads doubt or reluctance in my body language, they will probably ignore me. However, if I know in the core of my being that I want that horse to move, the horse is able to read that body language clearly. I’m standing up straighter. My steps are sure. I’m walking as if I’m moving the planet itself under my feet. With that kind of confidence, you can bet they’re moving out of my way! But here’s the thing: I don’t have to be “strong” with my horses when I move with intention. There’s no need to crack a whip or run at them. I don’t surprise or startle them. My presence, intention, and resulting body language are completely clear, allowing for smooth, soft movement.

My Argentine tango teachers call this clear intention “the step before the step.” There is often an almost imperceptible shift in a lead’s body language when they take this “step before the step.” For example, if they’re preparing to walk forward, they may shift their weight forward a little or send their chest slightly forward. When a lead takes this extra time to clarify intention in their own body before moving, it makes it infinitely easier for their partner to follow. When a dancer leads with clear intent, they don’t need to muscle their partner through the steps because their follower will have read their intent and prepared for the movement. As with the horses, light movement requires clear intention.

Here and now in 2023, thanks to these insights from the horses, I successfully lead my human partners on the dance floor. I’m forever grateful to the horses for teaching me this beautiful language and helping me to unlock a deeper understanding of what it means to communicate clearly with presence and intention. Even if you aren’t a dancer or a horse person, I encourage you to try communicating with this in mind, both verbally and non-verbally. Next time you walk down a busy sidewalk, consider playing with your presence and intention and see what happens. I bet you’ll find that when you move with meaning, other people will “hear” you and move accordingly. It’s been a long journey and continues to be an ongoing practice, but I’m glad to say that now when I ask for movement with presence and intention, both my horse and human partners are happy to dance away with me. 

Have you tried communicating with body language? If so, what was your experience? What helped you clarify your meaning? I’d love to hear your stories in the comments below or on Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn

May the horse be with you, always!

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Meaning of Leadership

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Freedom Within Restraints